Dear Grandma : 1 Year Later

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Dear Grandma,

They say that these things get easier with time. They say that you just have to be strong and push through it and then everything will be okay.

Well I don’t care what they say. No stretch of time can fully heal a broken heart.

The days may have passed us by but the memories are stronger than ever.

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Though you are not physically here beside me your presence in my life is stronger than ever. In the faces of passers by, in the music that fills the background, in the butterflies that endlessly follow my every step. You have never really been gone, and you never will be.

Some people may think that a year is a long time. But in the course of a lifetime one year is but a fleeting moment. You blink and that time has come and gone with no signs of slowing. Time is funny like that, I guess. When we want it to last is races away, yet we spend so much of our life wishing that work day would pass faster, or a bad day will be over with. We wish and wish for those days to speed up but in doing so we are wishing away precious moments.

Grandma, you were and will forever be the reminding voice in my life telling me to slow down, to relax, and to embrace each moment that I am lucky enough to live.

One year without feeling your hugs has not silenced your constant encouragement and motivational speeches when I need them most. One year without your hand written notes to me has not hindered your ability to brighten my days at the most spontaneous moments. Because one year without being able to see you and hold you and laugh with you could never wipe away the twenty-two years of unconditional love and irrevocable life knowledge that you bestowed upon me.

Is it still hard? Absolutely. Do I still cry some days? One hundred percent. But despite our physical distance from one another, we have never been closer. Our souls never more connected.

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As the days turn to years, the years turn to decades, you will forever be my beacon in the darkness. My guiding force. My best friend. My grandmother.

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I love you forever,

Kristyn xo

Kristyn Pacione